What I Wish
by angelhearts4you
Summary: Ciel kept a secret hidden for the sake of Sebastian and their relationship. But Sebastian stumbled upon it and everything changed in a flash. Years later, rumor has it that Ciel was dead. But on a job, Sebastian met someone he never imagined. AU
1. Part one: Last Letter

**Hello! This is my new story. In fact it is my second AU story. Though I haven't completed my first one. (_ _ )||| Wanted it to be a one-shot but it changed to a full story so enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: Kuroshitsuji isn't mine.**

**Warning: The first few chapters are all flashbacks. So there'll be stuff that you won't understand but I'll explain them later.**

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><p><em>Dear Sebastian,<em>

_If you are reading this, it means I'm already gone. Life isn't fair__, especially to us.__ I had thought I had a chance to meet up with you and explain things fully but somehow I feel that the time slips away too fast. So I __have decided to pen everything down__._

_Our relationship __was__ something I thought we would never have. Meeting and partnering you for my own benefits turned out to be more complex than I ever thought it would be. I __still __remember the first day whe__n__ we actually met. I was in the bakery that you owned and you greeted me with a smile that I__ can__ never forget. But my first thought about you was 'what a frightening guy he is'. Ironic__,__ isn't it? It turned out to be that you were someone… caring, passionate__…__ and possessive__,__ of course._

_It was a pity that things turned out like this but nothing can change that now. __The past stays as the past. All I can say is that i__t wasn't t__he way__ you th__ought__ it was. What I was hiding from you, what I was keeping mum about was all concerning the future we would have together. I never knew you would find out so early__,__ but since you had your connections, I__ figured i__t would not __have __be__en__ a problem at all._

_Every night, I would worry about what would happen if __the secret I had been hiding was revealed to you,__w__ondering how great the impact would be on us, on our relationship. And __indeed, it__ happened. It not only caused us pain and suffering, __but __it was something deeper than that__.__Something I am not capable of fully understanding, I guess._

_Perhaps it would have been better if I told you from the start__,__ but I was too afraid of the consequences that m__ay__ follow. Th__e secret__ I__ was__ hiding, it ruined us didn't it? The bridg__e__ w__as__ burnt,__ our relationship, broken.__W__e can't be the same any more can we?_

_Sebastian, I know you are mad at me. __I know you a__voided me at all cost when I looked for you. If you refuse to read on, I prefer that you burn everything in the parcel and this letter itself. I'll understand. __No matter how much I try to explain it,__ I know that you'll not forgive me at all._

_Love,_

_Ciel_

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><p><strong>I know it is very short but may I have your views please? Thank you.<strong>

**Review and comments. Criticism is appreciated. Flame it if you must. **


	2. Part two: Pain, or just regret?

**I'm back! The chapters would be shorter than the other stories ones cause they all happened in the past. I'll be focusing more on the important points first then elaborate when the time comes. So here it is… Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: Kuroshitsuji isn't mine.**

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><p>Ciel looked at the parcel in front of him. It was opened. He bent down and placed the letter inside. The last letter he would give to Sebastian, the last chance for him to explain himself. <em>Sebastian… I'm sorry.<em>

Then, he removed the ring from his left thumb. Ciel held it up, letting the light reflect off. A sad smile spread across his features. This ring was a gift from Sebastian. A shard of a whole diamond, a part of the whole. Sebastian had the other portion. When the two were put together, they formed the hope diamond. It also symbolized their love as one. It was a pity that was no longer true. After all, their relationship was broken. Ciel placed the band into its original box. The lid snapped shut and Ciel left it in the parcel. Never giving it a second glance, he stood up and left the room.

"Ding, dong," his doorbell sounded. Ciel opened it and found a messenger standing in front of him.

"Yes?" he asked. "How can I help you?"

"Good day, Sir, I'm here to pass you a letter," the male replied. He handed Ciel the letter and the latter accepted it. One glance and he knew it came from the higher-ups. He had a job to accomplish, a mission to complete.

"Thank you,' Ciel said and signed the clipboard before closing the door behind him. Sigh. It looked like he would be away again. Walking into his room, he opened the envelope and tossed it into the waste basket.

After reading the contents, Ciel burned the letter. A habit that started off as an order. The letter did not state how long it would take but it hinted that this case was not like the previous ones, easy and straight forward. And it did say that such as case like this would mean that the taker would have to risk his life.

Ciel gnawed his lip. _Should I... not go for this? I should be able to talk to the higher__-__ups but they might force me to do it anyway. What if... I don't come back? Sebastian... What if I don't see you again? I haven't explained myself yet..._

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><p><em>Dear Sebastian,<em>

_If you are reading this, it means that you want to know my explanation or perhaps find any evidence that you might use against your rivals. Sebastian, if there is any time that you are fed up by reading and can't be bothered anymore, my words still stand. Please remove the traces of this parcel and its contents from the face of the earth._

_If you were to take a look in the parcel again, you would see a ring box. I am returning this ring to you. One shard of the hope diamond. I feel and know that I don't deserve this gem anymore. __It shouldn't belong to me. __What I had hidden from you, __and __what I did... There isn't any hope left for me. Hope that we would be the same again. Hope that I would be able to meet you for the last time. __Hope for us to fall in love once again. __Hope for a chance for me to say goodbye. Thank you Sebastian, for all the times we had. For the comfort you gave me and the encouragement__. I swear those times will remain in my heart forever._

_Since you already know what I really am, I'll tell you this. But please keep this to yourself or you would bring harm to you. My last mission... It did not go well. Perhaps it was the fact that I did not have the ring on my finger. Or it was just that the previous night before I left, you were not beside me. Either way, I knew that my life would be in danger. I __have failed, but I have realized something else—__W__hat you see is not what it really is. The surface is what you see__,__ but on the inside,__ it goes much deeper beneath the surface__. I'm sorry Sebastian, I cannot say anymore._

_I miss you Sebastian. I really do. I miss those eyes, your voice, the heat of the body, the feel of your lips on mine, I remember them all_. _And I miss them all, as well__. But I'm thankful for the times we had. Never __will I forget them__._

_In this parcel, __I am also returning the photographs of us to you. You m__ay__ think it is stupid to give them to __a loved one__ that will n__ever __forgive me__, b__ut I want you to remember the last happy time__s__ we spent together, before... the truth was known. You can burn them, vent your anger of me on the photographs. I __will__ understand. What I really want is to stand before you and ask to be forgiven. But it's too late now._

_So... All I can do is to explain on paper. There is another envelope in the parcel. I have written my explanation down. It is up to you whether you want to believe me or just forget everything about us__ and pretend I never crossed your path. I will leave that choice to you._

_Love,_

_Ciel_

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><p><strong>Sebastian received the full explanation from Ciel. Would he accept it or burn it without reading? Review if you have time! Any improvements I can make? <strong>

**Reviews and comments please. Criticism is much appreciated. Flame it if you must.**


	3. Part three:Moved on

**A new chapter! It seems that no one answered my question in the author's note… *Sulks in a corner* Although I've posted this already, I'll leave the note up for one more day. Thank you all for reading so far! I know the author's note was a little redundant but… yea… Please answer the question! Or else the next few chapters would be coming out very late…**

**To promocat: I'm so sorry! I'm thinking of not revealing Ciel's secret at all. But I'll be dropping hints of what it is. Most probably throughout the whole story. Sorry, I can't give a direct answer! I'll say this; Ciel's secret consists of many things. And one of them includes the first part of this chapter. ^^ **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Kuroshitsuji**

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><p>"Sir," the male said while bowing to his superior.<p>

The other party in the room, the one that was being called 'Sir', replied, "What is it? Give me your full report." He was seated behind a desk, hands clasped together, showing authority.

The male, named Joshua Nile, passed a stack of paper to the other and began recounting the full account of his mission. "Sir, the target has escaped but we've managed to shot him in the leg. We are still locating him. I reckon that he would not get very far."

The superior's eyes glowed crimson. "What?" he hissed in displeasure. "He had escaped?"

"Yes My Lord," the Joshua said, cowering in fear. His superior was known for his coldness and authority. But also his ways to get rid of the useless.

"Under whose watch?" the male asked, voice suddenly dropping very low.

"Group nine, Sir."

The superior narrowed his eyes. Obviously this was not a good thing for their part as it would alert their enemy and they might strike anytime. Sigh. Guess it can't be helped.

"Nile. Tell me where was the last time the group saw him and keep me updated. I'll deal with them by myself."

Wide eyes stared at the male. "But… but Sir, this is a mere assignment. Why are you going for this?"

The other party's eyes flashed a brighter crimson. "That's because you've put us in danger. I can't risk letting him go, get it?" he snapped and Joshua flinched.

"Well?"

"Yes Sir!" Joshua bowed. The male's eyes returned to their original color. He waved his hand, dismissing the other. The lower ranked scurried away.

_It seems I'll have to go there again…_

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><p>"Welcome!" He was greeted with a cheerful smile. His eyes widened. <em>It can't be… She's still here…<em>

"Hello… Mey-… Miss," he said, glancing at the woman in front of him. It looked like she has no changed. Hair of the same length and shade since he had last seen her, the same old glasses, broken many times, rested on her nose. But no matter how she looked like now, or how close they were at first, they were now enemies.

"What cake would you like to have Sir?" she asked. Somehow, this male seemed very familiar but she could not place a finger on what it is.

"I'll have… this chocolate fudge, please," he requested. "And Earl Grey tea."

"Right away Sir. But I'm sorry, we don't serve Earl Grey tea anymore," she replied.

He stared at her. _No longer serve Earl Grey? _"But why? This store used to."

The lady smiled, sadly. "I'm sorry Sir, it was taken off the menu. Seba- Oops, I mean boss didn't want it anymore."

_Boss huh… Guess Sebastian didn't want anything that reminds him of me._

"It's fine then. Thank you."

As he ate his cake, he observed the shop. It was a long time since he came here and from the looks of it, everything has changed. Wallpapers that were once blue, his favorite color, changed to bright red. Tables and chairs that were white have been replaced by black. The color theme for this cake shop was just red and black, total opposite of what it used to be. But the counter remained where it was.

_CRASH!_

"WAHH! I"M SORRY! I DIDN'T MEAN TO BREAK. MISTER SEBASTIAN, FORGIVE ME!" A blond male came running out of the kitchen, tears streaming down his face.

_Finny…_

"Finny, I told you to be careful. And lower down your voice! We have customers here," another male said, emerging form where the blond came from.

The male, eating the cake, stopped short. _It's him…_

The raven, the one who was called Sebastian looked at the male. He gave a smile and apologized, "I'm sorry, please forgive us."

The male abruptly stood up and ran out of the shop. "So you are all just fine…" he muttered.

"What happened Sebastian? Why did he leave?" Finny asked, forgetting that the raven was after him.

"Maybe you got another admirer, eh? Sebastian?" Bard said.

"It might not be…" the raven trailed off. "Did you recognize him or something?"

His employers shook their heads. Then the redhead exclaimed, "Ah! Mister Sebastian! He wanted to order Earl Grey when he first came. When I told him that we do not sell that, it seemed like he was a little disappointed… Or sad. He also whispered something like 'reminds him of me'. Is he talking about you?"

Sebastian mussed over the given information. "An old customer. And who might that be?" he glanced at the half-eaten cake. _Chocolate fudge… with Earl Grey…. A weird combination… It can't be him anyway. He's dead. Who then?_

"Sebastian?" the female asked.

"Get back to your work! Clear the table Mey-Rin!" Sebastian said, snapping out of his thoughts.

_Who are you?_ The raven thought.

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><p><strong>Another longer chapter done! If you would have guessed what would happen next, I'll give you a virtual cookie! I'm sorry, this is a filler chapter though. If you are interested to beta for me, please PM me. Cause I really need one.<strong>

**Reviews and comments please. Criticism is deeply appreciated. Flame it if you must.**


	4. Part four: Mission Meeting

**WOO! The second daily update! I'm so sorry btw for not updating Angel From the Past. Still working on it. But here is the fourth chapter of What I Wish. Enjoy! Oh and please note that as the letters continue, they would change in writing style, though I try to keep them the same, because… well… Ciel had different emotions while writing them.**

**Disclaimer: Sigh…. Didn't I say this already? I do not own anything except the plot….**

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><p><em>Dear Sebastian,<em>

_I reckon that you want to know my explanation hence reading this. As I have written in the other letters, I will still say this. If you do not want to read on, please remove this and the package from the face of the earth._

_Sebastian, I know who you are and what you do. But have I ever hurt you when we were sleeping on the same bed? Have I poisoned you when I tried preparing our meals? Did I ever sabotage you when we were together? Why do you think I'm out to get you? Just trying to win your heart and then cut you down when you are unaware._

_These aren't my true intentions. I really fell in love with you and even though I'm gone, I still do. Why is it so hard for you to understand that I love you? But after all this, I came to realize one thing. It is that you do not love me as deep as how Agni loves Soma. Your love for me is just on the surface and not entirely. Perhaps this is also why I failed my mission. Maybe this is the reason why I'm gone._

_As you would know, both of us serve our masters or superiors if you want to call it. But did you ever wonder that this is how I repay my master? By serving him? You do know that I'm an orphan, left in an alley, cold and hungry when I was six. My master saw me and took me in. He fed me, clothed me and taught me how to defend myself. For this, I'm very grateful to him. _

_You might think that my master is just using me as a pawn, a tool. But truth is, I don't mind. Because if it was not for my master, I wouldn't have met you, I wouldn't know what love is and how it is like. _

_You have once asked me what the truth is. To me, I think there is no point to know the truth. What did you do when the truth is known? You dumped me. Threw me to one side like a rag doll. Do you regret when you knew the truth? I guess not. You accepted it so quickly that I wonder whether this is your 'love' for me. I love you and do you love me? _

_Our groups are enemies. Nothing can change that unless they merge together. Which is highly impossible. I am from one of them, you from the other. I was a human and you a demon. You had the upper hand when you knew my secret but you let me go. For what reasons I wonder, I'll never know. As mentioned earlier, my master took me in. He saved my life. I can't just leave him whenever I want to, can I? Would you do the same if you were me? I guess not. As members say, family comes first._

_Even if master does not treat me as a family, I see him as my father. But it lacked love. Then, I saw you on one of my mission. I was supposed to spy on you and the rest in the café. However, the worst happened. I fell in love. Love at first sight as people call it. Falling for the enemy, knowing that I'm putting myself at risk, living in danger every day, I still fell in love. In love with you, Sebastian. Not out to get you._

_This last mission, which I failed, had another objective. Which is to get rid of me. Even though I'm writing this in advance, I know this. My superiors had found out about my love for you and planned to get rid of me. Perhaps you wanted me dead too. And you got what you wished._

_At the end of all this, I just know one thing. I still don't know what love is but only a small glimpse of it. What happened to all the sweet promises that you told me? The sweet nothings when we lay in bed. They were nothing weren't they? But nevertheless, I still love you._

_Love,_

_Ciel_

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><p><strong>Present time, 1.28am<strong>

"Sir, target is heading your way, approaching at north-west direction," the walkie-talkie crackled.

"I see," the male whispered. "Time to end this."

As the target came nearer to him, the male crouched down, ready to pounce on him. He checked gun and his knife, making sure that they do not malfunction during the crucial moments.

The shadow grew bigger and footsteps sounded louder. The male waited until his target walked past his hiding place before pressing his knife against the neck. "Silence," he hissed.

_His soul just smells disgusting. Such a meal, who would want it?_

The target hardly put up a struggle, which surprised the male. _Useless bum. _He then dragged the target into an alley, dark and cold.

"Now, now. Tell me, why change alliance? Why betray your own company and join the other?" the male asked.

The target stayed silent, which annoyed his captor. "Answer me!" The sharp point of the knife pricked the skin of his neck. He located the left carotid artery of his target. "If not, half of you blood supply to your head gets cuts off," he continued.

"Sir… They forced me! If I don't… follow them…, they'll k…kill my family mem…bers," he stammered. The target knew who his captor was, and now, his life was dangerously dangling.

"So, they forced you to join," the other said. The man responded with vigorous nodding. "But you have put your family members at risk too. Because, I'll go after them to seek you out. Kill them if you stay silent," the superior continued.

"NO! Pleas Sir, don't" the target begged.

"Then, tell me everything you know about them," the male ordered. "Tell me."

"Sorry Sir, I don't know."

"Really?" he grinned. "Then you are of no use to me." He drew his knife, ready to slice the neck but was interrupted.

"STOP! Do not kill him."

"Who are you?" the superior asked.

"I am the same kind as you."

"I see."

"Release him."

"Not a chance. He might be in the same family as you but he betrayed us when forced," the male said.

The intruder stepped out of the shadow. Eyes bright crimson and his mouth, a thin tight line. _It's him again… Why do we always meet? Sebastian…_

"Demon, what do you want? His soul?"the intruder asked.

Recovering from the shock, the superior scoffed, "His soul? A lousy meal that wouldn't even fill my stomach. I get more satisfaction by killing him. I love seeing blood the most."

"Bloodlust. Lovely. But let him go."

"No way," the male said. A swift movement of his right hand and the target's head drooped. Blood gushing out of the wound. The superior dropped him onto the floor. "That should do it. What are you going to do now? Your spy is dead."

"But you're the head of your gang isn't? If I kill you, your rookies won't know what to do," Sebastian said, running towards his enemy.

"Tch," the superior muttered, bringing out his hands to protect himself.

Both males collided. The male swung his leg, aiming for Sebastian's stomach, and hit him full force. The raven stumbled a few steps back, clutching the injury. _He's good…_

The male crushed the walkie-talkie, letting the pieces shatter on the ground. Just in case... Charging forward, he raised his right fist, ready to punch the raven.

Swing. Punch. Hit.

Back. Duck. Kick.

Miss. Hit. Block.

This routine continued for both the males until a shot rang. The superior was shot in the head. A sniper.

_Good job Mey-Rin… _Sebastian thought.

He walked towards the male, blood gushing out of the wound. He was dead, or so it seemed. The metallic smell of the blood hit Sebastian, his eyes glowed brighter. But they widened after a moment. _This scent… this blood… it's so familiar. Who?_

Sebastian kneeled next to the body. Its face was covered by a piece of cloth. One eye shut the other covered by an eye patch. As he reached out to remove the cloth, the left hand of the body grabbed onto the raven's leg. "Have you forgotten that I'm a demon? Do you have such little faith in your own kind that I did not survive the shot?" the superior chuckled darkly.

The raven punched the male but missed. However, his leg was released. He got up and stretched. "Of course not. Why do you think I am thinking of that?"

His enemy tilted his head and said, "Oh. You do know the answer. Unless you have forgotten about it."

Sebastian said, "My. You are proud. But my objective here is clear. And that is to get rid of you." With that, the raven appeared before his enemy in a split second.

"Dammit!" the male cursed as he was being pinned onto the wall.

"Now, let me see your face before you die," Sebastian whispered.

The visible eye of the widened and it lost its glowing red color. Instead, its original color took its place.

"Go on. Do it then kill me," the male muttered. He lifted his chin and closed his eye, waiting for the raven to take the cloth away. Sebastian could feel the body of his enemy relax.

The cloth was ripped away and eye patch untied. Slowly, the superior opened both his eyes to the raven.

Mahogany eyes met an azure one. The very unique color that his former lover used to have. The depth of blue he loved to stare into. However, the other eye was purple. The same shade it used to have after his lover met him.

"No… It…"

"Yes it is. I am here. Alive."

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><p><strong>MWAHAHAHA! How are they going to react? HAHA! I kinda of have a song for this chapter and the next. It's called I'm alive by Becca. But it's the male version. Honestly, it's better though a little girly. It's for Ciel.<strong>

**So how is this chapter? Any questions or did I miss anything? Review s and comments please. Criticism is much appreciated. Flame it if you must.**


	5. Part five: The Broken hearted

**The next chapter as promised! Read this before you continue: Ciel's 'death' was on March the 28****th ****2008. Okay. So enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: This is nothing compared to the real Kuroshitsuji author.**

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><p><strong>Last time:<strong>

_Mahogany eyes met an azure one. The very unique color that his former lover used to have. The depth of blue he loved to stare into. However, the other eye was purple. The same shade it used to have after his lover met him._

"_No… It…"_

"_Yes it is. I am here. Alive."_

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><p><strong>Present time, 1.53am <strong>

"Ciel..."

The said male smirked. Mischief shining in his eye. "What's wrong Sebastian? Missed me?"

Hand tightened around the blue-eyed male's neck. "You... Ciel is not alive. He's dead. You are an imposter aren't you?" Jaws clenched, eyes blazing. "Get out of Ciel's body, demon. Face me as your own form," he growled.

The blue-haired male exasperated sighed. "I'm Ciel. Can't you recognize me already? That's true… It's been four years since my announced death." This resulted in the wall beside him to break. Small pieces of bricks flew, some hitting his face. Ciel could feel the force of the punch that was next to him.

"Ciel. Is. Dead. He. No. Longer. Lives. Demon, stop trying to find my weakness," hissed Sebastian, punctuating each word. They both locked gazes. Ciel never grew tired of those eyes. Deep, bright red. Burning stares and the heated glances they shared before all that had happened were now gone. What was left was the emotion of wanting him dead.

_I guess Sebastian didn't read the letters. Either that or he never accepted it. _Ciel thought. _It's too late… but… _Ciel never finished his thought as Sebastian's kneed him in his abdomen.

"Oomph… Seb…asti…an, you…" Ciel muttered, groaning in pain. His voice sounded so much like…

Those crimson eyes narrowed. _This can't be._

Oh yes. It can.

The male's aura and scent, both just like his former lover. The traitor. His betrayal. The shock and the pain he had caused. But his former lover was proud, and cold. Cute yet seductive. Just like this… adult, he was taunting Sebastian in a way Ciel would.

"Ciel's dead. Never is he going to come back. Not as a human, not as a demon. What do you know about him? About me?" Sebastian spat into the other's face.

Glazier-like orbs widened for a split second before they return to their original state. "Everything. Sebastian. Everything. I believe you have read the letters I sent you before… my 'death'. I've wrote that I'd give my life to you. For you to do whatever you want but…" Ciel said, in an indifferent voice.

"But what?"

Ciel had a smug look on his face. "But this isn't my time to die. Not yet," he replied. "Sorry Sebastian, but I have to do this."

_BANG!_

_!_

Sebastian released Ciel from his hold and clutched his wound. Pain shot through his body. "You!" he snarled.

Ciel looked down at him. "Sorry Sebastian. You can't get in my way. Not today. But I do hope we will meet again to resolve whatever that was left undone." He tucked his gun safely into his coat.

Ciel pinned the raven with his icy gaze before bending down. He whispered into Sebastian's ear, "Yes, Ciel is long dead. But he was killed by you. The Ciel you know is gone. All… All is left is me. Sebastian, remember this. You never bothered to listen to him… You've killed him. No one else but you. Goodbye my love." A little nibble on the ear and Ciel straightened from his pose. Chuckle. "Well, I'm done here. See you soon."

With that, the male jumped onto the roof of the building next to them and disappeared into the misty night sky. But that did not stop Sebastian from seeing the emotions that were running loose in those cold orbs before he left.

Pain. Guilt. Sadness. Loneliness. Sorrow.

_I'm sorry Sebastian, I don't want to hurt you further but it is necessary to stop you. Please forgive me for shooting you. I'm more than willing to take your pain away. __It's been so long since I've seen you. More than four years now. I'm relieved that you are living just fine. But the truth is… I'm not. Every day, I think of you. How drastic the change was after you knew my secret. It pains my heart to see you like this. All because of me._

What was left in the wake of Ciel was a letter.

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><p><strong>Ciel's POV<strong>

I left my ex-lover on the ground and escaped. Not because I fear that he may kill me but the fact that I could not keep up with the facade anymore. I knew that Sebastian was fine since that day I went to the café however seeing him today makes my heart swell.

Was it pride for my former lover? Or was it the guilt and sadness that made my heart cry?

I was jumping from building to building but my strength was slowly seeping away. Giving in, I collapsed onto the roof. My cold and indifferent mask broke. Hot tears were making their way down my cheek.

"Why? Sebastian, why? Have you forgotten about me? Those times?" I cried. Not once had I broken down after my so-called death. But seeing Sebastian today, seeing how much he wanted me dead shattered my heart. It was in pieces already but that broke it even more.

_I love you. More than words can express. Just listen to me once. I beg of you._

260 more days…

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><p><strong>Okay. I know you might be wondering what's with the days at the last line. I'll explain as the story progresses but it's very important. And I know this chapter isn't up to standard. Sorry about that.<strong>

**Reviews and comments please. Criticism deeply appreciated. Flame it if you must.**


	6. Part six: No Turning Point

**Updated! How's the story so far? From your reviews, I guess it's not that bad huh? Okay so this continues from where I left off from the previous chapter. ****And this is where the plot deepens! Enjoy!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own anything.**

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><p><strong>Present time, 2.16am<strong>

Dark, daunting dominating clouds moved across the sky. Ciel looked up to the heavens. _Why do you want me dead? Why do you want to kill me that much? Was it a mistake for you to meet me? Was our relationship a mistake for us?_ The rain was coming down, hitting Ciel on his face.

_Yes, the sky is crying for me too. My pathetic state. My broken heart._

Pitter patter, the rain fell on Ciel's face. With every passing minute, the droplets were getting bigger and heavier. They got painful and hit Ciel with unnecessary force. But despite that, Ciel stayed at his spot soaking in the pain that was inflicted. _Cry, like me. This pain, more, I want to feel pain even more. Sebastian, are you hurting like I am now?_

Weak. Broken. States that his master despises. Ciel regained his composure after a few minutes. He cannot show his weakness can he? He slipped into his icy and indifferent persona and dialed a number.

"Clear up the body in Street 72. Make sure that there are no traces of it," said the blue-haired male. He snapped his phone shut and turned around.

"What do you want?"

"Ke. Ke. Ke. Young Ciel. What are you going to do now? You left-"

"Undertaker. I do know how many days I left here," Ciel said, eyebrows raised. Amused at what the other had said.

"Since you do know... Then I don't need to remind you. What you have to accomplish and what to do. Between Sebastian and yourself, young one. Time is ticking."

"Yes." _For Sebastian and myself..._

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><p>Meanwhile, Sebastian was confused. Confused over the emotions that Ciel had in his eyes. Confused over his former lover's actions. Confused about the pain. The pain that was in his heart. The rain was coming down. The cold rain creating puddles here and there on the ground.<p>

_The letter!_

Sebastian reached out for the piece of paper in front of him. The very spot where Ciel last stood. Now, Sebastian was even more confused. Over what, you might wonder. He sighed. _Such a failure I am. _Demons were not suppose to feel emotions such as love. But came a male that attracted him and made him come to _love _that male. Yes, it was Ciel. The very one that betrayed him. And at this very moment, he even came to care about the letter that Ciel left.

"I thought you were gone. I thought you were dead. And yet, you raked up the past," he muttered. Conflicting emotions ran through him. Some of which were anger, pain and relief. He ripped over the envelop and scanned the content; not caring about the rain that was falling on him.

_Dear Sebastian,_

_Now you know that I am alive. Well and moving about. Over these four years, I had been living in the shadows. But I know that we will meet one day. Hence I wrote this in advance._

_I always wanted to find you. But then, thinking back about our past, the times when I pounded on your door to the wee hours and yet you did not answer, I realised that you might not believe that I'm back. __Sebastian, how are you? Do you even think of me whenever you are free? For me, I do._

_Life for me is tough but I still have to live it because my time is short. So short that I can't believe that that's the time left for me. You might be wonder what I'm saying for I am a demon but there's a reason why I'm one. However, this reason I must not disclose._

_How is your bakery coming along? I heard that it has further branched out and turned into a cafe. I miss those cakes of yours. Remember those times when we used to stay in the kitchen and I watch you bake? _

_Four years is a long time. Four years missing you Sebastian. Or are you still thinking about my secret that I kept from you? But I know, one day we will meet. Be it pleasant or unpleasant, I'll be happy enough to see you once again. You might not feel the same way too, but I understand for this mistake of mine cost us so much pain and suffering._

_Love,_

_Ciel_

Sebastian stared at the whole letter. Disbelief written all over his face. This was indeed Ciel's handwriting. Why did he become a demon, how? Was this really Ciel that he had thought he had dead?

_No, Ciel is nothing to me now. He was the past. __Our lives we live separately. He is now my enemy and always have been. He is the head of the organization and an enemy I would love to kill. Yes, for the sake of my 'family', he must be dead again. He has killed many and will continue to kill again._

He decided; Ciel was no more than an enemy. One that has to be gotten rid of.

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><p><strong>HAHAHA! Sebastian is so bad! And poor Ciel! But how's the chapter? Ask me if you have questions and I'll try my very best to answer them without spoiling the story for all.<strong>** There is a poll, a VERY important one. Please help me. I really need obvious results so if you do have some free time, go to my profile! Thanks.**

**Review if you have some free time! Criticism is totally appreciated. Flame it if you must.**


	7. Part seven: Work

**Updated! So sorry, been typing Angel From the Past hence ignored this but here you go! The next chapter!**

**Disclaimer: don't own anything.**

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><p>"Yes! That's it! Turn around. Chin, a little higher. Perfect!" The camera's shutter clicked furiously. The photographer behind it called out, "Chamber! Join Teal in the shot."<p>

"Robin~," the said male exclaimed, practically jumping onto the model that was posing. If one would observe the model, he would be able to see the model flinch and eyebrows twitching in disgust.

"Teal! Stop moving! Chambers, hurry up!" the male snapped. "I don't have time to waste!" he continued. Both models stopped their antics for the time being and carried on with their job.

The shot was done in a few minutes, Teal and Aleister Chamber straightened from their pose and relaxed. "Great job you two. We'll wrap up your shot today. Tomorrow, we'll be doing the vintage shot. Sutcliff! You're next!"

Teal sighed. Cerulean eye scanning the place. Another day as a model. Another day putting up with two certain males. Both, like the model, had long hair. Blond and red. Both of the male models exaggerate their speech and actions. And now, the blond one was approaching and the red head was complaining about his dress.

"Robin!" the blond model called, reaching out for the latter's hat. The model caught the hand and flung it aside. "Don't touch it!"

The male visibly pouted and he whined, "Teal..."

The said model ignored him and walked into the dressing room. An advantage of being a female. Taking the hat off, the model stared into the reflection that gazed back. An azure eye and a purple one. The model was blinded on one side. The purple eye was once the same as the cerulean one. But after a mark that dominated the orb, its color changed. And after the mark faded, the color still remained but the sight never came back. _It's been so long since I've dressed like this._

"Robin~ Are you done? Grell wants to bring us to a cake shop. He says that the cakes they serve there are the best!" a muffled voice came from the other side of the door said.

"Give me a minute. I'll be out," the model called to the speaker.

The model stripped out of the dress and tossed on a blouse, jacket and a skirt. Then, put on a medical eye patch on, covering the blind eye. Adjusting the ponytails of the wig, the model stepped out of the room and into the arms of a particular male.

"My dear robin, you look amazing!" the male crooned. "Let's go!" He grabbed the his colleague and they made their way to the car park where the red head was waiting.

"Finally!" he exclaimed. "Get in! I just can't wait to meet him again!"

Teal glanced at the male. "Who?" she asked.

The red head not only sent her a wink but also said, "Not telling! Oh... My Romeo... We will meet!" With that, he drifted off to his own dreamland.

The model scowled at the male. "I'm going. See you."

A hand grabbed her and pulled her back. "What?" she hissed.

"Robin... I know you like cakes. I've been there before. Trust me, they bake the best. You will _love _them," said Chambers.

The later hung her head. _Trust... And love... What are they to me now? Nothing._

"... Robin? Teal? Are you okay?"

The female nodded her head. "Fine. I'll go. Since I'm free anyway."

The blonde's face lit up and he pulled her towards the car. "Great! Let's go!"

The trio went to the cake shop and when they reached, Teal's visible eye widened. _Here?_

"Okay! Let's go!"

They entered the cafe and were greeted by the waitress. "Welcome!" She showed them their seats and placed their orders.

Teal ordered a strawberry cake and Darjeeling tea, which they surprisingly have. She was relieved as they were given a corner to sit when the waitress realised that they were models. _At least this reduces the chances of me meeting the rest. _She thought.

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><p><strong>HOHOHO! What will happen next is anyone's guess. ^^ You do know who the model and the waitress is right? Please go to my profile and help me do the poll. Thanks! <strong>

**Review if you have some free time!**


	8. part Eight: Conditions

**I'm so sorry! It's been long since I've updated but yea... so here you go! The next chapter!**

**I thank my beta jackie1201. You're the best. The first two chapters have be edited!**

**Disclaimer: the plot is mine only...**

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><p>"Ma'am, here's your cake and tea," Mey-Rin said. The lady looked up and a smile graced her features as she muttered a soft thank you.<p>

The waitress blushed. _She__'__s __so__ cute__! __No __wonder__ she__'__s__ a __famous__ model__. __Wonder__ what__ beauty__ products__ she__ uses__ for __that __fair__ smooth__ skin__, __the__ long__ eyelashes__ and__ the__ pink__ luscious__ lips__. __Plastic__ surgery__? _She turned and left the group.

The model, named Teal, took a sip of her tea and sighed. This tea was definitely brewed by Sebastian. _I __miss __those __days __when __we __would __sit __and __drink __a __cup__ of __tea__. __If __only__ they__ served __Earl __Grey__…_

"Robin, a penny for your thoughts?" Chamber asked. But the said female just shook her head and started to eat her cake. The sweet icy and sour strawberry matches perfectly. The fluffiness of the cake, the way the icing melts in her mouth, she loved it.

Her companions, Aleister and Grell were digging into their orders. "This is definitely the best," the blond male agreed with Grell. The red-head nodded and continued eating.

_Sebastian__... __I__ love__ your__ cakes __and __the __tea __that __you __make__. __I__ remember__ that __you __promised __me __that __the __cakes __you __make __will __get __better __and __indeed__ it __did__. __But __I __wonder__, __what __is __your __purpose__ of __baking__ now__? __The __reason __for __you __to __run __this __shop__. __Is__ this __purely__ the __purpose__ of __you __to __spy __on __others__ or __you__ still __love __the __cakes __you __make__? __There__ was __once __I__ told __you __that __I__ hated __pumpkin __and __you __changed __the__ recipe __of __your __most __recent __cake__._

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><p>"...Teal? Teal! CIEL!"<p>

The said male snapped his head up glared at the speaker. "What?" he hissed. Looking around the cafe, he breathed a sigh of relief. "Don't say my name out loud! I'm Teal now, not Ciel."

Grell rolled his eyes, "Tell me that when you're not staring into space! What were you thinking about anyway?"

Teal rolled her eyes and scoffed, "As if you cared if I told you. Wait… Where's Aleister?"

The red-haired male sighed as he answered, "Outside taking a call. But honestly Ciel… What are you going to do?"

The shoulders of the said male visibly sagged as all the remaining air left him. "I-I don't know… Sebastian… he hates me now…. He even wants me dead! And my purpose here it-it's meaningless. Sometimes… Grell, I want to give up. And regret that I shouldn't have asked Undertaker to save me. But all these time, I thank you Grell. For getting souls for me and telling me how Sebastian is. I really appreciate it," Ciel replied sincerely.

The said male nodded his head. "I see. But there's only 240 plus days left before… you know…"

Pushing away the plate of cake, Teal sipped her tea, knowing that it would calm her tremendously but that did not help to stop her frame from trembling.

Grell looked at the male in front of him. Ciel was his rival in love and someone he hated since he started a relationship with Sebastian. But after Ciel's death and revival, the red hair male got to see another side to the boy. A more insecure, lonely person rather than a proud and cold one. This made him pity the boy and he could sympathize with him, after all, Sebastian rejected the death god time and time again.

After the coming back of Ciel, Grell had been helping him get the souls needed for food. Ciel was indeed a demon but was able to stomach human food as well.

The door to the cafe opened and the visitor was greeted with a warm welcome.

"NO! This is not cute at all! The red and black is not cute!" the customer cried. The model who was sipping the tea slightly choked. _It's her..._

Then, the female customer said, "I sense a very cute aura coming from here!" The voice grew louder and clearer and the waitress tried to keep the girl away from the famous models, to no avail.

"It's Teal! And Grell! Oh Teal! You're so cute!" the female squealed. The said model stiffened and turned her head slowly, looking at the speaker. 'Elizabeth."

The female grabbed onto the model's hand and pulled her up. "I'll be borrowing her for a while," Elizabeth said, smiling to the redhead.

"H-hey! You can't drag her just like that!" Grell protested but Teal ensured him that she'll be alright.

The female duo walked into the cafe's washroom and locked the door behind them.

The model sighed and asked, "Elizabeth, why are you here? Do you have something you want to tell me?"

The blond female nodded and replied, "Yes. We have information on our latest target and it seems that Lau wants to tell you something personally. He requested you to go to the usual place to meet him."

Teal nodded, "Okay. I'll check it out. And Elizabeth, next time you want to look me up, text me. Please do not look for me like this." he sighed before continuing, "I don't want your cover to be revealed and Elizabeth, coming her is very dangerous. Please, next time, do not come here. You should know why."

Elizabeth frowned, "Is it because of him?"

Teal looked away and answered a simple yes. Then, he walked to the mirror and stared at his refection. "Leave Elizabeth. The longer you stay here the more dangerous it is. I'll be heading there soon."

The blond female bowed a little and said, "See you then." She left the washroom, leaving Teal all alone.

The model closed her eye and sighed. She had no idea why she would say so long in the cafe. Was it because she longed to see Sebastian again or was it because she missed their cakes? To these questions, she had no idea.

Slowly, the cerulean orb opened and widened a few moments later. She was staring into the red eyes of a certain reflection. "Sebastian..."

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><p><strong>MWAHAHA! I've stopped here. Yes, the next chapter would be their conversation again. And hopefully I can reveal more about their past as lovers... ^^<strong>

**Review and comment if you have some free time! Criticism is appreciated. Flame it if you must. **


	9. Special Chapter: Powder

**Oh yea! The next chapter! Aren't you guys happy that I'll not stop? I know I failed as an author, giving up so early. Hence, I promise, I'll complete this story no matter what. Hope you'll continue to support me! OH! And one more thing! THIS CHAPTER IS NOT ANGSTY! XD IT'S LIGHT AND FLUFFY, I hope… So ENJOY~**

**Thanks to my Beta Jackie1201 and well… my little 'brother'… Who is apparently ranting about monster hunter at the moment. DAY AND NIGHT! xD**

**Disclaimer: Kuroshitsuji doesn't belong to me.**

**Here's what Jackie1201 has to say: (hasn't edited... so sorry)**

**Special note: IT'S NOT ANGST. AND this ****happens before everything you've read in the previous chapters. Like before the mess and stuff. As requested and suggested by some of my readers. ^^**

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><p><em>Special Chapter: Powder<em>

_By angelhearts4you_

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><p>"Welcome!"<p>

He was greeted by a waitress. Red hair that was tied up and a pair of glasses rested on her nose. The male smiled at her and nodded as the woman showed him his place. The chair was pulled out and he sat, closing his eyes as he listened to the sounds around him. Then, he felt a familiar presence. And smell. It was _him._

"Ciel," the male began. "What are you doing here? I thought you have work to do?"

The said male sighed and opened his bright blue eyes. He glanced up and locked eyes with the older. He replied, "I just wanted to see you. Can't I?" With a small pout forming.

Chuckling to himself, the other questioned, "Oh?" Slowly, he bend down and pecked his lover on his lips. "Sure you can. It's just that I wasn't expecting you today."

Ciel waved his hand, dismissing the comment. "The photographer couldn't make it. But it can't be helped. I thought I could surprise you. How's your day?"

"Getting better," answered the raven as he claimed the younger's lips again. Ciel slightly moaned as tongues battle for dominance. In the end, Ciel gave in, letting Sebastian explore his mouth. As they parted, Ciel stared into the ruby eyes.

"I love you," he stated.

The older male blinked, taken aback by the sudden confession. He then smiled gently at the younger and answered, "And I, you."

Ciel pulled back from the embrace, his eyes scanning Sebastian's body. "What were you doing before I came?" he asked, noticing the white apron that was on the raven. Taking in a breath, he sniffed the male. "Baking," he said, answering his own question.

Sebastian nodded and pulled the male up. "Follow me. I've got something to show you."

The couple made their way to the kitchen that was situated behind the cashier. As Ciel passed a certain blond employee, he waved and greeted him. "Finny."

Looking up, the blond grinned at him. "Ciel! You're early!" Then, he moved closer to the blue-haired male and whispered into his ear, "Mister Sebastian was baking something before you came. It looks really good."

Cerulean eyes lit up as Ciel absorbed this piece of information. The thought of eating a new cake that Sebastian had baked made the younger eager to see the product.

Impatiently, he pulled Sebastian further into the kitchen and demanded, "Where? Where's the cake?"

The raven shook his head and ruffled the younger's hair. "A moment, Ciel. Be patient." Blue eyes followed his movement as he opened the refrigerator and pulled out a tray. A tray full of different types of miniature cakes. Mouth watering, Ciel made his way closer, arms reaching out to pick any one.

Even before he could touch one, Sebastian stopped him. "Ciel, wait." The said robin looked up and frowned. Eyes blinking, he tried to understand why the raven stopped him.

'Your tea," reminded Sebastian, placing a cup of steaming hot liquid in front of the young male. Ciel grinned sheepishly, as he muttered a soft 'oh'. He picked up the cup and blew the tea, then; he inhaled deeply, taking in the fragrance. He cocked his head, trying to name that scent.

"This is... Darjeeling tea, isn't it?" asked the blue-eyed male.

Sebastian nodded. "Very good, Ciel," he praised the younger. Cutting a bite size piece of one of the cakes, he fed the younger. Ciel opened his mouth with a small 'ah' and happily chomped on it.

It was the four months ago when they first met. In this very shop. Ciel was assigned a job as a model to advertise for this bakery and that was when he met the raven.

**Four months ago:**

"Teal," her manager called.

The said female turned and answered, "Yes? You called?" As her manager walked up to her, he handed a few pieces of paper to her.

"Here are some opportunities. You can choose from here to increase your fame."

The female looked at the papers, quickly scanning through them. But none seemed to catch her attention. As she was about to hand them back, one particular one caught her cerulean eyes.

"Advertise for this bakery..." she muttered. Reading through the details, her eyes sparkled. The terms of this modeling job was just to pose with the cakes and the shop, being surrounded by different types of cakes. "Lysic..." That was the name of the bakery and it sounded very familiar... Then, a thought struck her. _It's their hideout... Master said it before... _But on the brighter side, being surrounded by cakes was like a dream to her. And that was what made her take up the offer; cakes.

Teal, the model has a sweet tooth. She, or rather he who cross-dresses, would search the entire country for the best cakes. No matter how far it was or how expensive they were.

The day for the photo shot drew closer and was finally here. Teal couldn't contain her excitement and slowly, she drifted off to her own dreamland, surrounded by cakes and cakes alone. Chocolate and strawberry ones especially.

"Teal!" shouted someone, drawing her back to reality. Just as she was about to snap at the person, she saw who was it and calmed down.

"Elizabeth," Teal greeted the female, who was her fashion designer and the most trusted person in her... his _own _organization. But that was a different story altogether.

Holding up a few clothing items, the blond said, "You'll be wearing these few dresses at Lysic. And Ci-Teal, don't get too carried away." The said female flushed and looked away.

"I know what I have to do there," said Teal, looking around to check whether anyone was of listening distance. When she felt that they were safe, she continued, "You too, Elizabeth. You know what you have to accomplish. This time, we cannot fail. Or else Master..." Teal shivered at the thought. Her companion, eyes serious, nodded. Then, the robin took out two earpieces. Handing one over to the designer, she said in a firm and serious voice, "We'll keep in contact this way. And get as much information as possible."

Both fitted the earpieces into their respective places. Teal's partially covered by the wig she was wearing. Whereas Elizabeth's could not be seen under her blond curls. The blond opened her mouth but closed it after she thought better not to say it. The action did not go unnoticed by the model. "What is it Elizabeth?"

The female shook her head, "It's nothing," she muttered. But after the way Teal pinned her under her stare, she voiced her thoughts. "Be careful Young Master." The model visibly softened, cerulean orbs bright and clear.

"Thank you Elizabeth. As I've said before, you can call me Ciel not Young Master. I'm not ready for that title."

The model was actually a male cross-dressing. It was his job and that was where he could make use of his looks. In the modeling industry dressed as a female. As Teal.

The group made their way to the bakery. When they arrived, the photographer quickly set up while Madam Middleford, Teal's personal make-up artiste, and Elizabeth adorned the model, doing the final touches.

"Hello," a male approached and greeted them. Teal, whose back was facing the male, turned around. Blue eyes met deep red ones. The model took a step back unknowingly. Something...something about the male captivated her yet... frightened her.

Lucky for Teal, her manager stepped in. "Hello Mister..."

"Sebastian," provided the male. "Thank you for coming here today. I appreciate it much."

Teal narrowed her eyes. _So... this was their most trusted member... _A member that could prove dangerous for his own 'family'. "Liz," she called, not giving away the blonde's full name. The said female nodded, getting the message. Both of them had to keep an eye on this male.

Before anyone could notice the tense atmosphere, the young model stepped forward and stretched her hand out. "Good day to you Mister Sebastian. Let's work together to promote your shop," she smiled at the raven.

Sebastian accepted the hand and shook it. "Yes. Let's," he agreed.

**Back to 4 months later…**

Ciel looked at the raven. A sad smile spread across his features. If only the happiness would last... He knew that one day; their relationship would have to end. Because of what he is and what he was hiding, but now, it didn't bother him. He would have to enjoy whatever time he had with the raven.

His eyes drifted away from Sebastian and landed on a bowl of unused flour. A smirk slowly made its way to the robin's face. He let out a small chuckle, a plan began brewing. Sebastian heard it and looked at his lover. "What's so funny?"

Trying to conceal the grin, Ciel replied innocently, "Nothing~" Perhaps he had said it too angelically that roused the raven's curiosity.

Eyebrows raised, Sebastian asked, "Oh really?" as he made his way round the table. Ciel nodded, trying to convince the raven. With the swipe of his hand, he took the tray and pushed it into the older's, preventing him from coming any closer.

"I'm done with them. I want some more," he demanded, hoping that Sebastian wouldn't find something amiss and spoil his plan.

The black-haired male looked at his robin and sighed. Honestly, it was a wonder how Ciel could maintain his weight and looks from the amount of cakes he consumed. But considering their nightly activities, burning off calories was an easy task. Taking the tray from Ciel, Sebastian made his way to the sink. "You've to wait Ciel. Cakes don't appear whenever you want them to." Then, he turned around and under the flow of running water, he began scrubbing the metal.

"Fine then," replied the younger, with the smirk he once had on his face. He crept towards the end of the table, where the bowl of flour sat. A giggle bubbled forth but he forced it back down. No way was his plan going to be found out so soon.

His cerulean eyes gleamed with mischief as they stared at the white powder. Then, a pair of fair hands immersed themselves into the flour, taking as much as they could. Ciel called, "Sebastian." voice full of seriousness.

Thinking that Ciel was angry or some sort, the raven whirled around. However, only to find himself being hit by flour. One on his shoulder and another, his hair. The culprit bit his lips, trying to control himself but failed.

"I g-got you!" laughed Ciel, shoulders shaking uncontrollably. The bewildered look that Sebastian had only added to the laughter. The robin's sweet voice filled the room as he gasped for breath. "That... t-that was a ...g-good o-one," he giggled.

Knowing that he had been fooled, Sebastian growled, "Why you...!" He scooped a handful of the same white powder and flung it at Ciel across the table.

Flour drifted around the room as it hit its target. Ciel was stunned for a moment, before falling into another fit of laughter. It wasn't long that the contagious giggles made Sebastian follow as well. The raven had a hearty laugh as he dodged from the incoming attack of flour.

Ciel cursed to himself, but it didn't take him long to realize that the raven was aiming at him once again. This time, he decided, he wouldn't be a sitting duck. Ciel bend over as he felt flour whizzed over his head. He ran towards the corner of the kitchen, where more unused flour sat. With two filled hands of flour, he flung it at Sebastian.

"Yes!" he cried when the raven was hit. 'Got you!" he chuckled. A simple caking tasting session turned into a flour fight between the robin and the raven.

"You…!" growled Sebastian playfully as he chased the younger around the room. The blue-haired male squealed as he hid and dodged from his lover.

He wasn't going to let Ciel get away so easily. Sebastian lunged at the male, tackling him to the floor. Ciel shrieked when he was hit. To prevent any bruises or injury, Sebastian tucked the young robin, _his _robin, in his chest as they fell.

Ciel chortled with delight when they landed. The scent and warmth of Sebastian calmed his nerves as the adrenaline faded away. "That was fun," he commented, looking at the raven, chin against his chest.

Pulling back a little, Sebastian gazed at the one he so loved. The one that had brought so much joy and laughter into his dark life. "But look at the mess," he sighed, teasing Ciel.

Eyebrows furrowed as Ciel processed the words. "Aw… Come on Sebastian. Don't be a spoilt sport. It was fun, wasn't it?" To prove his point, Ciel brought his right hand, still coated with flour, and touched the raven's nose. Leaving a white spot there.

Sebastian gave a deep throaty laugh. "Sure it was.' He paused. "Love you so much Ciel."

The said male leaned in for a kiss. "And so do I," he murmured against Sebastian's lips.

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><p>Heavy breathing scattered the room. The pair lay together, legs entwined, on the wrinkled bed sheets. Spent they were as they sought comfort in each other's arms. The younger sighed as he lazily drew random patterns on his partner's chest.<p>

"You know," he began. "I have work tomorrow. How am I going to explain to everyone the reason behind me not being at my best? Especially the photographer! I can barely get up, let alone stand!"

A low rumble could be heard coming from the raven. "But you love it when I pounded into you hard and fast. No?" Sebastian watched in delight as blood rushed up to Ciel's face.

"That... t-that's... But..." Ciel stuttered, speechless. He hid his face in Sebastian's chest, inhaling the scent of sex and sweat.

"I'm able to call in for you, telling your agency that you're sick. Then, we can spend the whole day in bed. H-"

"Sebastian!" Ciel cried, abruptly sitting up. However, winced at the pain. "That's absurd! You can't do that!"

The said male looked up and stared into the sea of blue, his own eyes shining in amusement. "Why not, Ciel? You know you like it when I'm hard and rough. And we can have the whole day. Me fucking you where you need me most."

Well, wasn't that a tempting idea, thought Ciel. But the thought of… _work _made Ciel shake his head. "No. As much as I would love to spend the day with you, I still have to work. And don't you?"

"If it's you, I'll throw away everything," Sebastian replied with earnest eyes. Ciel's heart constricted after hearing it. _Oh Sebastian… If you only knew… _This was the man the robin fell for; this was the man whom treated the younger the best, giving him all that he'll ask for. But this was the man he had to lie to, an enemy of his organization, and the robin would have to obey whatever orders he was given. This man, whom he so loved, would kill him _if he only knew…._

Ciel gave a false smile but still, that left his face. Sadness was written all over his features, gazing out of the window that was next to the bed, he stared into darkness. Darkness… For all his life, he had lived in nothing but darkness. All he knew were the dark and cruel ways of this Earth. He had seen much, experienced much more but after meeting the raven, his life had new hope. And he came to know the meaning behind happiness.

"Ciel?" the older asked, concerned he was. He tugged lightly on the said male's arm.

Ciel fell back on the bad with a soft thud. "It's nothing," he said, trying to put the raven's mind at ease. "It's just that the sky is starless. A lonely night indeed. But... I've got you by my side," continued the blue-hair male, snuggling close to the older. He yawned, his eyelids started to droop.

"Sleep my love, sleep," whispered Sebastian. Enchanted by the smooth baritone voice, Ciel drifted off. It had been a good day.

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><p>Eyelids fluttered open as the room came into focus. Orbs looked at the ceiling above before flickering to the person deep asleep next to him.<p>

He whispered his partner's name and there was no response. Satisfied that he was soundly asleep, the male climbed out of bed and headed to the bathroom. On his way, he picked up an extra set of clothing and his hand phone.

The door closed and locked behind him with a click. Then, he scrolled through his phone, checking for missed calls or messages. And indeed, there were.

He redialed the number and was put on another line. "Yes," he said and over the buzz of instructions, he replied, "Yes. Understood."

Cleaning himself, the male then slipped into his clothing. The usual black ones. He checked his reflection one final time before exiting the room.

The male padded to where his companion slept. Lowering his upper half of his body, he kissed his forehead. "I'm sorry. And… I love you." Soft words were whispered and their only witness was the bright full moon.

He gazed lovingly at the male he so loved. _I'm sorry… _With that, he turned away and walked out of the bedroom, face and heart filled with guilt.

Slinging his bag over his shoulders, the male left the house without a noise. Once reaching the main road, he waited. And watched as pair of headlights appeared around the corner, the vehicle stopped in front of him.

"Sir," the driver addressed him. Yes, he was greatly respected by those whom he worked with. After all, he was brought up by the master since young. Without his master, he wouldn't be here today.

"The items you've requested are in the back of the vehicle. Master sends his regards to you, telling you that there isn't any urgency in reporting the information you've gathered. He wants you to slowly uncover their plans. Also, he would like to meet you at the main office two weeks from now," the driver told the male, his superior.

The male nodded and said, "I will. But for now, I trust that you have the basic information for me?"

* * *

><p>He swung his leg, kicking the door open. It slammed back and revealed the room. With his most trusted gun, he made small careful steps into the area.<p>

"There's nothing here," he reported into the walkie-talkie, which crackled and answered back.

"Sir, there's nothing here too. What're your orders?"

His alert eyes scanned the area, taking in every single detail. They occasionally flicker to the entrance of the room. "Search the area. But," he cautioned, "Be sure that you do not mess the place. Only take what's necessary."

He came to a stop, in front of a desk. His left gloved hand reached out and pulled the drawer. It didn't bulge. After a few tries, he stopped, knowing that he'd disturbed the long settled dust. Placing his Beretta 92 into its holster, he pulled out a screwdriver; a handy tool in times of need. Forcing the metal tip into the lock, he slowly turned the screwdriver in a clockwise direction.

Satisfied that the drawer clicked open, the male pulled the wooden compartment. He smirked, yes, he had found something. Piles of paper; letters and bills, money too. He reached out and took a couple of letters. They were open and his eyes quickly scanned through them.

"Bingo," muttered the figure clad in black. He had found evidence and uncovered more information. This sender of these letters… knew a lot and this proved to be a problem for him. Dropping the letters inside his backpack that he had brought, he sighed. Instead of spending the lonely night with his lover, he was out here carrying out orders. But it couldn't be helped.

The contents of the drawer were thoroughly searched through. He had to work fast, or else his cover would be blown. Nimble fingers ran through the papers of none importance until the male across a folder. With narrowed eyes, he picked it up. It was thick and across the cover, the word 'confidential' was stamped.

_Well well, what a find_, he thought.

But his eyes flew wide open as the folder's contents were revealed. _This… this is… _A faded photograph stared back at him. _This is… Darren, head of machinery… he'd died of an unknown cause. _They never found his body and hence assumed that he was dead. Now, he knew, he now knew how one of his members had died. Under the hands of _them…_

He flipped further. Reports of the same kind were all filed in. Reports of dead people, be it they were from his 'family' or theirs, some dated ten years back. As he neared the end, he stopped. _It can't be… Why? W-what's this…?_

The male carefully read the page, eyes picking up words of importance. "Main branch… sub-branch… agreement… better for all…" he muttered. The gears of his head began to turn as they connected the information he had just read to his organization's activities so far. And they made sense. They fitted nicely, without any loopholes. He hung his head low. After all these times he had been in the organization, he was living in deception and so have the other members. But he being brought up by the head of the 'family' and was confirmed that he would be the next in line, he never knew this… till today. With clenched fists, he intended to demand an explanation from his 'parent'.

"Who's there?" someone shouted. The male snapped the folder with a snap and pulled out his Beretta, however kept it out of sight.

A shadow soon fell on him and the male found himself being cornered by the other. The tip of the blade his enemy held was pressed against his neck, hard enough to draw small droplets of blood, staining the metal.

'Who are you?" the captor demanded. The male kept silent, much to the displeasure of the other. He winced when the tip was pushed further. "Speak!"

The male's shoulders shook as he let out a silent chuckle, much to the amusement of his enemy, who in return growled. He sighed. _Guess it couldn't be helped, _he thought. Giving in, the male said, "Do you not who I am? Surely, you must have heard of me before."

Eyebrows furrowed, the enemy whispered into his ear, "I don't care who you are. The fact that you, from my rival organization, are enough to make me eliminate you."

The male tsked, "That shouldn't be that case. If I were gone, which I promise you I'll not be; our families would go into a deeper conflict. No? And of course, with my death, my members will haunt not just you but everyone you love and your 'family' too. I believe you are just a rookie, not knowing the contents of this file." He paused; listening to his captor's breathing getting heavier. "What if you were to read what is stated here? You would demand an explanation from your leader, asking why such an important and significant contract was hidden beneath the pile of papers and locked away. Won't you?"

He knew, his enemy knew that he was testing his patience, pushing his limits. But he had to take the risk for the information he had gotten his hands on was far more important than his own life. It concerned the history and establishment of his and his enemy's organizations.

His enemy hesitated, which proved that the faith in his own 'family' had wavered. Then, the captor sucked in air and replied him, "I will not. For my only job is to guard this place. Not to dig up any old materials. "But from his tone, the male knew that his captor was a newbie; who did not know much about his own role he played in the organization. _Such a failure he was…_

The male said nothing in return, just waiting for the right moment to strike. Whereas his enemy grew more agitated as the seconds ticked by. Clearly, he was not trained in finishing of a person as of yet. He smirked, the ball was in his court now, and all he has to do is to wait for a wrong move and finish the other.

"Put the folder down," ordered his captor, in which he obeyed the instruction. The folder was placed on the table and the male checked his gun, making sure that the silencer was in place.

AS he did that, he commented, "I'm sure after you finished me, your 'family' would promote you several ranks for killing such a deadly enemy." The grip on the knife was tightened, an action that did not go unnoticed by the male. Instead, the grin on his face grew wider. The enemy had fallen into his trap. He was just stalling for time, confusing his enemy and as a result, he knew that the emotions of the other were stirred. A weakness of newbies, a trait the needed to be removed when the first training begun.

With his ego boosted, the other was starting to lose focus. His aim of getting rid of him was getting further. And this was what the male was waiting for.

Swiftly, he raised his right head above his head, finger on the trigger and pressed it.

Blood spluttered on the floor and the body fell back. The male managed to catch the knife before it drew a horizontal line across his neck. After all, he couldn't leave such an obvious injury for others to see.

He turned and looked at the body. His enemy's eyes were wide open, staring at the ceiling. In this kind of line, such deaths are necessary for one to gain an upper hand over the others. The bullet that went through his head lay next to him. The male picked it up and dropped it in a zip lock bag, together with its shell. Such important evidence could not be left at the scene.

Then, he cleaned the knife, clearing it of his own blood. As he took another glance at the corpse, he reached for his gadget and pushed a button. "Clear out of the area. I've been found. Take whatever you've uncovered. And I expect to meet the whole group in fifteen," he talked into it.

"Yes Sir!" it replied.

Squatting next to the dead enemy, he replaced the knife on him and whispered, "Thanks to your inability, I've managed to get such a valuable piece of information," he paused, chuckling to himself. "Don't worry; your death will not be in vain."

He got up, grabbed the folder and left the room. The door closed behind him, hiding the dead man.

* * *

><p>The male crept into the room. As he looked towards the bed that he and his lover shared, he sighed with relief.<p>

He dropped his backpack on the floor and walked towards the sleeping male. Then, he stripped out of the clean set of clothes, letting them pool at his feet. The fragrance of the shampoo that he had used earlier was still evident. At least, it was better then he, smelling like gunpowder, blood and sweat.

Yes, he had gotten rid of those before returning home. Even his Beretta 92 was with a trusted member. It wasn't safe to bring back such an obvious item. However, the folder he had just found few hours back was still with him. The contents would have to be carefully analyzed before his meeting with the master; he had to be prepared.

The male sat at the edge of the bed and looked out of the window. The lonely moon stared back at him; nothing had changed. The mission, the blood that stained his hands; nothing had changed. But with his lover next to him, everything felt alright. Except…

Shaking his head, he cleared those thoughts. Every single nerve was begging him to let them rest, which he did. He got under the covers and let his eyelids close over his eyes. In the comfort and warmth of his lover, the male was pulled into the worlds of darkness. It had been… a _relatively_ good day.

* * *

><p><strong>Done! <strong>**^^ This is a special chapter hence is longer than the others and yes, this happens before Sebastian and Ciel broke up. **

**I've received some feedback that the timeline of this fic is quite confusing so hence, I've written it down. Take note that all the chapters I've posted, excluding the special chapters, happened after their relationship ended.**

Chapters One and Two – Happened in the past, four years ago. Before Ciel became a demon, before his 'death'.

Chapter Three – In the present, four years later. Ciel has become a demon and went to Sebastian's café.

Chapter Four – This chapter has both past and present in it. The first part would be in the past while the next happened in the present, and that is when Ciel encountered Sebastian.

Chapter Five and Six – This chapter is continuous from Chapter Four, hence it happened in the present.

Chapter Seven and Eight – Both chapters are in present time and this is where Ciel and his colleagues patron Sebastian's café.

**Review and comment if you have some free time.**** Flame it if you must. **


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